1. The most obvious, of course, is the presence of the actual children. But just in case...
2. Your furniture is arranged in order to block off rooms, hide cords, and protect plants. It is a feng shui nightmare.
3. Half of your monthly grocery bill is diapers. The other half is formula. A fortune goes in, a fortune comes out.
4. The "new release" section of the video store has movies you've never even heard of.
5. You think it's perfectly normal to eat dinner at 4:30. The restaurant is empty except for your clan and the busload of senior tourists.
6. You've started referring to yourself in the third person. "Mummy is having lunch now. Don't touch Mummy's drink."
7. Going to the bathroom alone is a luxury. You pretend to have diarrhea so your spouse won't question why you have to go every half hour.
8. You can name all the Teletubbies, sing the Barney song, and do a mean imitation of Dora.
9. This list is almost too long for you to read in one sitting.