Saturday, July 07, 2007

MIL

Things my Mother in Law has said this past two weeks that make my head hurt:
-"I've had scabies for the past 5 years. I've stopped taking the treatment, though. It's just a scam to make money."
-"I think I have Scarlet Fever."
-"You look like you've been around a lot." (to my friend from work.)
-"I got athletes foot yesterday, so I'm wearing my shoes in the house."
-"Why do you think that house (recently shown to us by the patient real estate agent) had a dead leaf in the cupboard?"
-"I should go to the hospital! I feel just terrible! I think my heart is exploding!"
-"Do you think it's safe to let the children expose themselves to the sun like that?" (They were not naked. But they did have short sleeves.)
-"The mechanic is just trying to rip me off. That yellow light has been on for weeks, and nothing bad has happened to the car."
-"They do voice print at the bank, you know. That's why I like to just write notes, and not talk while I'm there."

And the one and only thing she has said that made me leap for joy:
"I think I need to go back. I will drive down south with you guys, and then continue on home. This is not the right place for me."

6 comments:

Lisa said...

OMG. You're a stronger woman than I.

Amy said...

Wow, that makes me feel bad for rolling my eyes so much at my mother-in-law. She's not so bad, we're just so (thankfully) different. :)

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Hoo boy! Let me know when the last one comes true and we can all toast the event!

sky said...

She's been taking lessons from my mother, who delivers what I call "The Grim Reaper Report" in every email, message, phone call - who is sick, who has died, who is going to die, who wished they were dead, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH!

She is suspicious of everyone and everything...

The New Parent said...

Hi AM---very funny stuff (tho not sure how funny it is when it's first said!).

MIL's can be quite a trip!

Marybeth said...

Gonna link you if you don't mind...because you are so freaking hilarious!