Thursday, May 18, 2006

If you think your spouse does nothing, send him away for 10 days.

Hubby is leaving tomorrow for a 10 day school trip. He gets to fly across the country, do a bit of sight-seeing, be away from the Yukon, and have a break from his everyday life. However, he is an INTP. What this really means is that Hubby's personal hell could be defined by "Going away from home for a long period of time; being forced to converse with other humans; change from routine of everyday life." As well, there will be no "time off" for the 10 days, which means he will return to me a very cranky, stressed out man. I'm trying to feel bad for him, I really am. But I'm an EFSJ, which basically means that his hell would be my heaven. For me, the idea of being left home, alone, for 10 days of boring routine, is pure agony. Oh wait...I won't be alone! I will have The TERRORS!!!
I know that some people are unfortunate enough to be married to cavemen. I lucked out. My husband is at least as involved in the parenting as I am. He cooks supper most nights. He plays with the kids. He disciplines them. He bathes them, reads to them, and tucks the Girl Terror in with songs and stories every night. We go grocery shopping and out for dinner (even if it's McDonald's) as a family every weekend. He lets me sleep in as long as I like on Sundays. He listens to me babbling away every evening (I'm not naive enough to believe he's actually listening) about absolutely nothing. Without him, I will be trapped in a never ending cycle of days, just me and the kids, no adult to converse with, and no one to keep the bed warm for me at night.
To say that the kids will miss him is an understatement. Boy Terror knows what time Daddy comes home every day, and whenever Hubby is late, we get to sing the "Where oh where oh where is Daddy?" song. He also doesn't like to eat supper if his Daddy isn't home. Girl Terror is convinced that I have no idea about bedtime. I sing the wrong songs. I sing the right songs, but the wrong way. I read the books wrong. I am NOT a reasonable substitution for her Daddy.
You can expect a lot of whiney blog entries while he's gone, and a great deal of excitement when he returns. We will be "sad and lonely" as Girl Terror says. If you happen (HA!) to be in the area, drop by. You will know it's the right house by the cloud of misery hanging over it.


Rootietoot said...

oh I am so with you. Sweet Daddio was on the road for a year, and I never really knew if he was going to be home or not. The times he was gone for 2 weeks were (almost) unadulterated hell. My kids were nearing their teens at the time, so it wasn't as bad as it could have been, but I despised it. I watched ALOT of Jane Austen dvd's during that year. It's also hard to get motivated to cook a real meal when you know the recipients would rather have mac and cheese.
Whine away, and chill a bottle of Asti Spumante for when he gets home.

Anonymous said...

You are soooo lucky, my husband did not start being active in our childrens everyday life until they were 5, 6, & 8. He was around but he worked long hours, he left before they got up and usually came home after they were in bed on most days. We would go and visit him at lunch or dinner sometimes and his off days were treated as special occasions. We usually went out to eat or the movies.
But now he does a whole lot more, we go by groceries, birthday gifts, school clothes(which he hates going)and christmas shopping together. He realized he was missing out on the girls lives and he decided to change jobs and basically his whole life to be with us.

debby said...

I also agree.. you are so fortunate to have such an involved IS so hard to be apart though!

OldHorsetailSnake said...

Doesn't he have a cell phone? Would be the next best thing to having him home, I would think.

honestyrain said...

dan is home every day all day as he works from home. i cannnnnot imagine what life would be like if he went away for ten days. difficult and lonely, i think.