Wednesday, January 14, 2009

and then life kicks you in the ass

This Christmas (NOT New Year's) I made a very quiet, private resolution. I decided to take control of my health. If you know me, right about now, you're snorting. Because my health? Has always been wonky. When Hubby promised "in sickness and in health" he had no idea what he was actually saying. If there is a germ out there, I'll find it. A rare, oddball sort of sickness? I'll get it. Unusual symptoms that make the doctor scratch his head? Not all that unusual here in the Average household. So for me to "take control" is a bit of a misnomer. What I actually meant was "I'm going to be aware of my body, and change my life to improve my overall health." This is not a diet. Not an "exercise regime". Just.....some small steps.
I've been eating fresh, raw veggies whenever possible. Instead of a granola bar, I eat an apple for breakfast. I still snack. I just be aware that supper should be smaller to help compensate. I don't automatically buy a cookie with lunch. Just small things, you know?
In the mornings, I've been doing a teeny bit of exercise. Not enough to depress me, or make me want to quit, but each day I add a few minutes. I do sit-ups, leg lifts, push-ups, and I just added light weights for my arms. Nothing to brag about, just enough to feel less like a slug. And like I said, baby steps. Each day I feel motivated to do a bit more for myself. Weight loss was not the goal, but a happy side effect. I've lost 3 pounds since January 1st. Nothing to write home about, but enough to make me stand taller.
Yesterday afternoon, I had a mini-stroke. At least, that's what the doctor's are assuming, and later today I'll go have a CT scan and find out some details. I am young-ish (38 is still young-ish, right?!), have low blood pressure, no heart troubles, nothing to flag me as "at risk". So this was a bit of a surprise. I spent last evening in emergency, having x-rays, blood work, and questions filled out. And still, in my head, I'm going "Seriously? A mini-stroke? Me?"
To sum up: I decided to get healthy. And two weeks later, I had a stroke. I'd like to know what I did in my past life to deserve this sort of karma.


Fawn said...

Oh, geez, that's crappy. I was reading along feeling all happy for you until you said mini-stroke. And then I thought you were joking.

I hope that's the last time you ever experience one of those.

Matt, Kara and Hunter said...

That sounds really scary. I sure hope everything turns out okay!

WackyMummy said...

That'll teach you. Seriously, though, I hope you don't have any more, or the doctor was wrong. What happened? What made you think "stroke"? Destiny will always kick you in the butt. In the meantime, enjoy life and everything... in moderation. :)

Anonymous said...

Karma my dear friend has nothing to do with it. Sometimes we need a little (well in this case not so little) kick in the ass to remind us that life is unpredictable, unnerving and sometimes down right uncomfortable. Take it as a sign that it is not your time, you have not yet fufilled your lifes purposes and goals. Take it to heart that sometimes just sometimes we as mothers MUST put ourselves first (gasp how strange would that be) and that does not make us bad people nor mothers nor wives nor friends. Maybe this was the universe telling you now its time for you!! I believe in you. YOU GO GIRL!!!!!!

Carole said...

Wow! Like Fawn, I thought you were joking too, until I kept reading. I hope all goes well. Do take care.

Don't Bug Me! said...

There is no such thing as karma when it comes to our health. Sometimes life is just hard. I try to do the right things in life too - I have never smoked, I have always been active, I don't over-eat etc etc. Then I find out that I have liver and kidney disease. Great! What I have I done to deserve this? Absolutely nothing. So, we just have to get one with our lives and deal with it the best we can. Life is not fair, life can be tough. We all have our crosses to bear and some are heavier than others. I just hope that this was just a small warning for you and nothing more serious. Goodluck!

wendy said...

Glad to hear your ok!! I too am trying to lead the healthier lifestyle battle. I feel like an idiot for losing 40 lbs and then my stupid body betrays me and I ended up in a depression for over a year and gained it all back. I was there! I was healthy!! and now I have to fight for it again. It will be a lifelong struggle for me I'm afraid.
Keep up the baby steps, sometimes it's the only way to get anywhere!