Friday, September 18, 2009

New school term, new fun times.

The school year is now underway, and I think I've got a handle on my classes. It looks like it will be a good semester. I gave the first quiz this week, and is pretty clear who studied, and who thought they already knew everything. Silly kids. I warned them, too, that if they failed the birth control/reproductive system quiz, it would be an awkward parent teacher interview!

"So, Mr and Mrs Parent. Here is Johnny's quiz. You'll notice he didn't write anything for questions 5 through 8, and oh! Look! Despite my best efforts, Johnny still cannot identify a vulva. And while I appreciate his creativity and humour, I really don't think we want him believing that the tip of his penis is called "lollipop". Hmmm. Perhaps some at home study time would help?"

I have only had to confiscate two ipods and one cell phone. This group seems to be quick at catching on. Could be the fact that I answered the cell phone while I had it on my desk, and politely told the buddy on the other end that "Susie is in Planning class right now. You might as well come back into the building, since she won't be meeting you for the pre-planned smoke break".

The only down side to the new semester is the lack of condoms. The school council has decided that having a basket of free condoms in my room was sending the wrong message. Never mind that the Health Services people send me 50 condoms every few weeks. Clearly, the students are using them, and that is bad. I guess I better stock up on pregnancy tests.

1 comment:

WackyMummy said...

LOL! Like a lack of condoms is going to stop kids from having sex! Here's an idea to help kids practice abstinence: have them work at Chucky Cheese for a week. THAT would be more helpful than hiding the condoms.

And is that what the boys are telling the girls the head of the penis is called? A lollipop? Is that supposed to be convincing?! Maybe if some GRAPE-FLAVORED CONDOMS were available it would be plausible.

Good luck. ;)