honest ramblings

Life is not fair.
Shocking news, isn't it? I am a member of a cake forum, and we are currently discussing societies tendency to sugar coat everything.
When kids play sports, not every participant wins. So why are we giving them all ribbons? Sometimes I see parents give little Johnny a gift on Susie's birthday, because you know, otherwise he would feel left out. Left out of his SISTER'S birthday celebration!
When we were kids (back in the time of dinosaurs and all that) if you didn't win, the idea was you would try harder. Now, your mother will call the coach, demand that you be listed as a winner "because you couldn't do any better with such a terrible coach", and then she will get that coach fired.
In my opinion, if you can't do the school work, you fail. Unfortunately, since I am not in charge of these decisions, I now have a room full of grade 9 kids who can't read, have never written an essay, and must use the calculator on their cell phone for the most basic math. Apparently, this has saved their self-esteem.
I admit, I can be a bit too honest. Don't ask me what I think unless you really, really want to know. But in the same way, if I ask you for YOUR opinion, it means that I respect you enough to hear your true thoughts. Even if that means my shirt looks like a reject from the 70's, and also makes my ass look massive.

Christmas Cuties

I have writer's block. Again. I realize that the last week has been full of wonderful blog fodder, but do you think I wrote any of it down? Of course not!
We had a lovely Christmas here in the Average House. Boy Terror got a yo-yo, which is exactly what he has been asking Santa for since October. He does not know how to work a yo-yo. Neither does anyone else in the house. That doesn't matter, he's happy. Girl Terror got a mini cake baking set, and tomorrow we will break it out and do some serious baking.
Generally, the Christmas vacation so far has been filled with fun, laughter, and serious cuteness. So rather than keep rambling, with no end in sight, I'll leave you with these pictures.

The things boys say

Sometimes boys say things they really shouldn't. Or they blurt out stuff and they realize what a bad idea it was. Some examples from the "grown-up" boys in my life:

"Remember what your hairdresser said about your natural colour being beige? Yeah...it's time to dye again."

"Women don't want honesty. They think they do, but when they get it, they realize that actually they just want the fairy tale."

When you are only a little boy, though, the things you say are just cute.

While helping me clean bathrooms: "I pee upstairs. Only Daddy pees down in this toilet. So.....this must be Daddy's mess." sigh. "I guess I better teach Daddy how to aim his penis better."

While playing poker with the entire family: "I want YOU to win this hand, Mummy, since you are losing so much."

Suck it up and have fun, or else.

I love my job. I do. But some days, I just want to throw my hands up and quit. Yesterday was one of those days.
My second period class is a Family Studies class. It's one of the easiest courses in the school to pass, and it nicely fits the "I want to graduate, so what can I shove into my schedule so I have enough credits" slot. This term, I have all girls. Fifteen girls are on the register, but six regularly show up. With a class that size, I have lots of freedom to do things that wouldn't work with a larger group.
Lately a few of the girls have been....whiny. They have been giving me attitude. Eye rolling. Actually, it's just one, but she is strong and leads three or four others into being miserable. I've heard a fair bit of "But this is boooorrrriiiiing. Why don't you ever do anything fun with us?" Because you know, it's MY job to entertain them.
So, in order to bring some holiday cheer into our week, and to spark their interest in the kitchen, I said we would make cookies. I brought all the stuff from home. I lugged in
a bag of flour
a bag of sugar
carton of eggs
two cookie sheets
ginger
cinnamon
cloves
shortening
and told them we were making gingersnaps! Yay! Tasty holiday cookies! The whole building will smell delightful! And they said....
"I don't liiikkkkeee gingersnaps"
"Ewwww...I don't want to touch an egg"
"This is stuuuuupppiddd"
"How booooorrriiing"

And I lost it. I looked up from the recipe, and saw two girls actually enjoying this. The rest were sulking. "Enough!! If you don't like gingersnaps, sit over there, and don't make any. I'm not forcing you to eat them. Just stop the whining. I am sick to death of you guys complaining and moaning that we never do anything, and now that we are, you are just being miserable. If you don't like it, just be quiet."
At that point, I was still fairly calm. But then that one stellar student had to ask "Mrs. F, are you cranky today?"
...
...
...
"ACTUALLY, I was HAPPY today until you guys showed up. The eye rolling, the attitude, and the general disrespect has totally ruined my mood. Today, and EVERY DAY. I would like to do something nice and fun. But Noooooo. It's not good enough for the princesses. I work hard to make this class great, and if you don't like it, tough. Today, we are making GINGERSNAPS. Suck it up, and have fun, or shut up. Got it?"

There was silence, and then one brave soul said "I think the cookies are burning."

People of that Big Blue Store

1. I am, in my heart, a mean person.
2. Stuff makes me laugh. I like to share that stuff.
3. You might find this website mean. I hope not. I hope it makes you laugh so hard your coffee shoots out your nose.
4. Go! Enjoy!! Learn from the mistakes of others!!

Dammit, I think I'm aging.

I recently turned 39. It kind of snuck up on me, you know? Maybe because for two years I refused to accept the fact that I was 30. I was fooling myself into thinking "I'm not aging! Look! I'm still a spring flower!". But the reality is, I see.....The Signs.
My hairdresser has informed me that my natural hair colour is now beige. Not a pretty silver, or dignified white, or even grey. Beige. Like the walls in a boring office. Guess who will be dyeing their hair forever and ever?!
I spent ages staring into the mirror the other night, trying to figure out why I have giant crevices on either side of my mouth. Somehow, I thought my wrinkles would be delicate, and perhaps confined to places no one ever sees. Nope. My mouth now has a yucky wrinkle on each end, pointing down towards my double chin.
What really brought the whole "aging" thing to light was when I noticed vertical grooves appearing in my fingernails. I thought that perhaps my diet was lacking in calcium. Maybe I need more hand lotion. I googled, and when I didn't get the results I wanted, I googled again. Know what causes vertical grooves in your fingernails? AGE. GETTING OLD. I was not pleased. Especially since while I was staring at my nails in horror, I noticed the wrinkles all over my hands. Arrghhhhhhh!
Moral of this rambling tale? I don't remember. I'm getting old, and it makes me cranky.

Blogging meme

I've had the questions for this meme kicking around in my draft box for ages, and since I'm stuck in Writer's Block Hell, this seems like a good time to get it out. I don't remember where I got it, so if it was from you, let me know!!!
Leave me a comment and tell me so I know to come see your answers.

1. How long have you been blogging?

Five years and four months. Wow! Time sure flies!

2. Why did you start blogging?

I was living in a tiny rural town, staying at home with two little ones. I happen to be a person with lots of words that must get out every day. With no one to talk to, I turned to the internet.

3. What have you found to be the benefits of blogging?

I love being able to go back and read what life was like a year ago, or even 5 years ago. I know we all think we will remember every cute thing our children ever do, but the sleep deprivation does take a toll! Plus, I've connected with a lot of amazing people on the blogger world.

4. How many times a week do you post an entry?

I don't want to admit this. When I first started, I wrote at least one post a day. Now, I'm struggling to do one a week. I need topics, people!!

5. How many different blogs do you read on a regular basis?

I read around ten blogs. I'm always looking for new ones, so let me know if you have some great suggestions.

6. Do you comment on other people’s blogs?

Not as often as I should, but I try!! Do YOU? Hmmmm? Do YOU LEAVE ME COMMENTS?

7. Do you keep track of how many visitors you have? Is so, are you satisfied with your numbers?

I used to. I don't anymore. I am a praise junkie, though, so more readers and more comments are always welcome.

8. Do you ever regret a post that you wrote?

Yes. Fortunately, Hubby reads this blog, and he isn't afraid to tell me when I need to take something down.

9. Do you think your audience has a true sense of who you are based on your blog?

Probably not. I'm really honest on my blog, but I don't show all sides of my personality.

10. Do you blog under your real name?

No. What, you thought I was really named Average, last name Mom?

11. Are there topics that you would never blog about?

Yes. I like my job, so I keep my mouth shut. Also certain aspects of my marriage are not for public viewing.

12. What is the theme/topic of your blog?

Mostly parenting, but I also talk about my job as a high school teacher.

13. Do you have more than one blog? If so, why?

No. I can barely manage to post here. Another blog would do me in.